TOGETHERNESS TAX

This new tax on things which are together will soon float Slovenia's economic boat.

For instance if inspectors discovered two umbrellas together in an elephant's foot, they would be empowered to levy a small tax on the owners of both, and of the stand.

In another example, biscuits would have to be packaged and sold individually to avoid the Togetherness Tax.

Advantages: already widely piloted in Slovenia with the least popular biscuits, and half-teaspoon-sized bags of sugar, at coffee establishments.

TT is a rational good-for-business tax which would manipulate us in the direction of individuality - i.e. individually-wrapped grains of sugar, kept in separate bowls.

Different sorts of bowls though, or they would have to go on different tables. Promotes diversity.

In theory TT could cover dual presidencies, shadow Church- or oligarch-controlled governments, etc.

But in practice TT will help Slovenia's official government - the views of any two of its members are so unlikely to match, their chances of owing themselves any Togetherness Tax would be virtually nil.